hi blog,
its been sixteen days since i last had a session with u. which can possibly mean tht i have not been in one of my depressing moods since so many days and tht is actually a gud sign (tho it is not the entire truth but a gud enuf assumption nevertheless(after all i am an engineer)).
it also does not mean tht today i am not feelin very gud .in fact the last few days have been one hell of a ride where i have written journals, forgotten them at wierd places, rewritten them and submitted them. a special mention needs to be made of one micro controller project which has made me wiser( you are supposed to learn from ur mistakes after all) and has taken me to a superbly scenic locale near ghatkopar station tht i odrwise wud never have seen in my life.
but now all my submissions are over, the college has officially declared a term end and only the studying for the exam part is left( dont knw whether tht is the easier or the dificult part of the sem. only time and future blogs will tell). of course there is the prelims in 2 days time which seems to be the biggest farce in the name of an examination i have ever witnessed(arun roy's iit-jee class tests come a close second). even then i will try opening my books b4 every exam(the relevant books and not novels) and the rest i leave to god, allah, jesus and whoever else is listening.
so this blog is not an indication of any moods of mine, it is just an announcement of things to come. it is the dawn of an era( every pl is equivalent to an era) tht will lead to many new periods of frustration, happiness, fun, a little study and a lot of timepass. and of course my regular mandir sessions which have become one of the most memorable(for lack of a better adjective(sumtimes my mind goes completely blank)) memoriess of the pl.
the next blog is going to be a review of the "prelims". a complete chronicle of an engineering terminology tht can be tht has no meaning except tht it forms part of the engineering jargon. till then bye.
Saturday, October 22, 2005
Thursday, October 6, 2005
Cant think of any title
hi
i am back and this time with a huge lot of stuff to write about.there is so much tht i want to put into this blog tht i fear tht a lot of it will be left out simply bcoz i forgot to write about it. of course the chronology of all tht i put in here is definitely not in any order of time, importance or any other parameter. so let the games begin........
to begin with, yes, i am on one of my periodic lows again. seems to me tht i think of this blog only when i am feeling low or depressed or some such emotional imbalance. somehow i never find the time or inclination to write in when i am feeling not so low( a high is out of the question coz i cant remember the last time i felt like i was on cloud #3 even (let aone cloud #9)). so as much as i try to avoid it, this blog ends up being a chronicle of all the lows tht i have been feeling since i have started blogging and now i think it is better tht i even stop trying.
at the root of this low , depression whtever u choose to call it, is the sme old culprit, engineering or my college or the people in it, i am not really sure. but one thing is for sure, it has sumthin to do with engineering. and so currently i hate, no despise, everything even remotely connected with it.
there is no comfort even in academics (read opening an engineering book and staring at it for hours on end without really assimilating anything). i used to think i cud use those seemingly unending lines of text as a possible solution to my dark moods. but this time even tht is not working. hasnt been working since days actually. i am not able to study at home and the library induces sleep before i can say abc.wht this means is tht this study leave will not be so rosy as my other ones and i will have to really slog it out then. so might as well gear up for it.
anyone reading this wud suggest tht if coll is a bore then stay at home. but even here there is a snag. the only things to do at home r study, play on the comp, watch tv(read keep switching channels) or sleep. all of which get boring after a really short period of time which is why getting home early is also discarded as an option.wht i wud really like to do is to get away sumwhere where there r no people outside of a select group for as far as the eye can see. being in mumbai i knw tht is sumthin which is actually impossible which is y i think the terrace of luv kush towers might be a nice place. i dont knw y but for one very brief moment when i was standing outside my classroom, i actually thot tht it mite just be a nice idea to try jumping (only for a very brief moment after which my senses got the better off me). but it just emphasises how much i long to be away from a lot of things, mainly people. i am basically tired of seeing all the sad faces tht my coll seems to have an endless supply of. people who r basically complaining or crying over sumthin or the other(even i do tht most of the times. its not their fault really). but its just tht currently i wud like to go away from it all.
then there is also vikram factor. i dont y but i just feel like hitting him whenever i see him. not like hurting or killing him kind of hitting but the playful kind of hitting. he doesnot seem to realise this and retaliates with all his might which often ends up hurting me. even rite now i have a mild swelling on my forehead which bursts into spasms of pain whenever i open my mouth to eat, yawn or do anything. so tomm onwards i promise not to touch him.
the current low tht i am going thru is different in the form tht it started during college hours, which is a first of its kind as far as i can remember( which is also not a very long time coz i cant remember a lot). it started sumtime in the CTSS lecture after which i just dint want to stay in coll which led to me missin my GD semis and also my soc event. and bcoz i had already exhausted all my options of things to do at home i ended up actually thinking abt wht i wud be writing in this blog today. sumtime during tht session, i had a feeling tht maybe these lows r bcoz of a desire to write sumthing. so i am not sure whether i am writing bcoz i feel a little down or i am feeling a little more than a little down bcoz i want to write. hope it is the former.
another really frustrating thing happening currently is the navratri festival bcoz of which a bunch of ppl who really wud not make gud bathroom singers even start blaring guju songs at the top of their voice forgetting even the basic fact tht they have a mike in their hand. all this and maybe somethings more which i am missing contribute to this being one of the more forgettable times of my life. just hope tht it gets over soon.
anways i think i am finally done with everything i wanted to say. hopefully i havent missed out on anything. if i have theres nothing tht can be done abt it so no point in doing anything abt it.
i knw this does not make for a gud read but it wasnt intended to be one in the first place. this as i said in the beginning (which is so long back tht u mite have forgotten it) a chronicle of my lows and nething tht i find worthy of mention so suggestions if any r definitely not welcome.
i am back and this time with a huge lot of stuff to write about.there is so much tht i want to put into this blog tht i fear tht a lot of it will be left out simply bcoz i forgot to write about it. of course the chronology of all tht i put in here is definitely not in any order of time, importance or any other parameter. so let the games begin........
to begin with, yes, i am on one of my periodic lows again. seems to me tht i think of this blog only when i am feeling low or depressed or some such emotional imbalance. somehow i never find the time or inclination to write in when i am feeling not so low( a high is out of the question coz i cant remember the last time i felt like i was on cloud #3 even (let aone cloud #9)). so as much as i try to avoid it, this blog ends up being a chronicle of all the lows tht i have been feeling since i have started blogging and now i think it is better tht i even stop trying.
at the root of this low , depression whtever u choose to call it, is the sme old culprit, engineering or my college or the people in it, i am not really sure. but one thing is for sure, it has sumthin to do with engineering. and so currently i hate, no despise, everything even remotely connected with it.
there is no comfort even in academics (read opening an engineering book and staring at it for hours on end without really assimilating anything). i used to think i cud use those seemingly unending lines of text as a possible solution to my dark moods. but this time even tht is not working. hasnt been working since days actually. i am not able to study at home and the library induces sleep before i can say abc.wht this means is tht this study leave will not be so rosy as my other ones and i will have to really slog it out then. so might as well gear up for it.
anyone reading this wud suggest tht if coll is a bore then stay at home. but even here there is a snag. the only things to do at home r study, play on the comp, watch tv(read keep switching channels) or sleep. all of which get boring after a really short period of time which is why getting home early is also discarded as an option.wht i wud really like to do is to get away sumwhere where there r no people outside of a select group for as far as the eye can see. being in mumbai i knw tht is sumthin which is actually impossible which is y i think the terrace of luv kush towers might be a nice place. i dont knw y but for one very brief moment when i was standing outside my classroom, i actually thot tht it mite just be a nice idea to try jumping (only for a very brief moment after which my senses got the better off me). but it just emphasises how much i long to be away from a lot of things, mainly people. i am basically tired of seeing all the sad faces tht my coll seems to have an endless supply of. people who r basically complaining or crying over sumthin or the other(even i do tht most of the times. its not their fault really). but its just tht currently i wud like to go away from it all.
then there is also vikram factor. i dont y but i just feel like hitting him whenever i see him. not like hurting or killing him kind of hitting but the playful kind of hitting. he doesnot seem to realise this and retaliates with all his might which often ends up hurting me. even rite now i have a mild swelling on my forehead which bursts into spasms of pain whenever i open my mouth to eat, yawn or do anything. so tomm onwards i promise not to touch him.
the current low tht i am going thru is different in the form tht it started during college hours, which is a first of its kind as far as i can remember( which is also not a very long time coz i cant remember a lot). it started sumtime in the CTSS lecture after which i just dint want to stay in coll which led to me missin my GD semis and also my soc event. and bcoz i had already exhausted all my options of things to do at home i ended up actually thinking abt wht i wud be writing in this blog today. sumtime during tht session, i had a feeling tht maybe these lows r bcoz of a desire to write sumthing. so i am not sure whether i am writing bcoz i feel a little down or i am feeling a little more than a little down bcoz i want to write. hope it is the former.
another really frustrating thing happening currently is the navratri festival bcoz of which a bunch of ppl who really wud not make gud bathroom singers even start blaring guju songs at the top of their voice forgetting even the basic fact tht they have a mike in their hand. all this and maybe somethings more which i am missing contribute to this being one of the more forgettable times of my life. just hope tht it gets over soon.
anways i think i am finally done with everything i wanted to say. hopefully i havent missed out on anything. if i have theres nothing tht can be done abt it so no point in doing anything abt it.
i knw this does not make for a gud read but it wasnt intended to be one in the first place. this as i said in the beginning (which is so long back tht u mite have forgotten it) a chronicle of my lows and nething tht i find worthy of mention so suggestions if any r definitely not welcome.
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